Transitions, Etc.

I don't know who this artist is but I want them to haunt my whole life.

I don't know who this artist is but I want them to haunt my whole life.

I know this is a terribly old lady thing to say (do I start every blog post this way?), but I can't believe it's November. I currently have various and sundry electricities lighting up my nervous system: likewise nervous energy and excitement about everything to come (there's so, so much and I can tell you about some of it), little thrills of self-satisfaction at all of the generally positive change I've manifested thus far in my 29th year, and fizzles of personal disappointment because, although I'd say I'm in the 90th percentile of creative living, I haven't set up the framework I need to write to my heart and cerebral cortex's content. Writing makes me super happy, y'all, but I let other life things edge it out of priority ranking. That's all.

Things to be nervous/excited about: November means National Novel Writing Month, and because I make my own rules, I'm using NaNoWriMo as a kick in the butt to restart my book of coming of age essays from scratch and finish it before I turn 30 in December. I'm also expanding the timeline for myself for sanity's sake, because I'm in the midst of yoga teacher training among other time intensive projects. My love and lovely pup are moving in with me in a couple of weeks and I predict it will be a real snuggly time. We're also planning a BIG, BIG, BIG life change early next year but I have my reasons for not splaying news about said change across the internet quite yet. Starcatcher, the astrology-based social media and dating app I've been working on is NOT dead and we'll be looking for investors soon. And, like I mentioned, I'll be 30 in December and have things to wrap up - projects to finish and youthful burdens that I just don't feel like carrying with me.

As far as self-satisfaction goes, I'm self-employed! And sometimes it's scary (Money! Taxes! Insurance! Accountability!) but it's also really, really cool. I'm a person who craves variety and flexibility in my work, but I'm also a person who requires structure and always forgets she requires structure until she no longer has any structure - you know?

Along those wiggly lines, I had visions of writing for myself and/or publications that carry meaning for me every single day, and I just haven't figured out how to do that yet. I'm waking up later. I'm scrambling to do the work I'm getting paid for. I'm having LOTS of fun and practicing yoga daily (teacher training is satisfying in that I'm deepening my practice so that I may one day not require studio frills - my goal here is self-sufficient self-care). I'm mentally prepping for what's next... but sometimes I live in "what's next" and I forget to do the quiet things I enjoy all on my own. Right now. Real change requires commitment and I'm recommitting to my writing practice just as I committed to a yoga practice. Namaste. 

And that's me! Simple updates like this one help me rebuild my atrophied writing muscles a bit, so you'll be hearing from me more as I slog through a project I've been on and off again with for YEARS. Soooo talk to you soon!


Rose Truesdale1 Comment